Current Times
Unless you’ve been living under a rock (if you have I suggest you stay there) you will be aware of COVID-19 and how it has changed how we are currently living.
If you are like me and really struggle with change then you will understand what I was feeling. At the beginning of lockdown, I didn’t know what to do with myself. I was supposed to start a new job but three days before I was due to start it was closed. I couldn’t stick to my normal routine or do any of the activities I usually do. This made me really upset me and I got very stressed.
Lots of people tend to think that autistic people are apathetic but in reality, we tend to over-empathise. So as well as having all my worries, I have adopted my parents concerns and my sister stress too. It is all a little bit too much for just my head and I am struggling to cope with all of these thoughts.
Need for Clarity
I am really struggling with my need for clarity at the moment. There is so much information available to us at the moment but it is all slightly different and none of it is very clear. I like clear rules, what I can do and what I can’t do. There are some obvious rules in place, but not for everything.
I have a need for clarity, if there is something going on or going to happen I need to know the plan. Currently, there is no clarity. This is something that is causing me a lot of stress, worries and what ifs.
My Routines
I love my routines, they help me through each day. However, at the beginning of lockdown, my routines all fell apart. I can’t do all of the things I was doing and this really threw me. I have spent a long time perfecting my routines and making them exactly how I want them and now I can’t follow them.
So, after a few days of lockdown, I decided to make myself new routines, doing lots of activities that I enjoy doing but wouldn’t normally do every day. My old morning routine used to take 45 minutes so I would get to work on time and my new morning routine now takes anywhere between 2 to 3 hours which is perfect because it takes up a large chunk of my morning and sets the tone for a good day.
Motivation
Some days I wake up feeling super motivated and some days I have absolutely none. I know I write a lot about motivation, productivity and activities to do but I also want to make it clear that it is okay to be unmotivated. It is okay to spend a day in bed watching movies if you really don’t want to do anything, however, spending day after day in bed doing nothing is not very good for you or your mental health.
So, by all means, take a day to relax if you need to but push yourself the next day to keep on going. Allow yourself time when you need it but don’t take advantage of it.
Getting Back on Track
At the moment we all are adjusting to a new way of life and we need to not be so hard on ourselves. One day this will be a distant memory, something that children will e taught in history lessons. Things change and we need to remember that. We will not be living like this forever so it is important to remind ourselves of this.
I would love to know how everyone else is currently feeling/struggling with now and how you are coping or what you have changed, so please get in touch!
